


Local Creatures Scream for Twenty Minutes and Nothing is Accomplished

by GothicPixi



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Barry-centric i guess?, Camp Nanowrimo, F/M, Guess What Barry's Magic Race Is, Kinda, M/M, Memes, Taako too he's doing some snooping, University AU, gay humor, mythical creatures AU, not super heavy on ships but they're there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 23:51:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14224524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GothicPixi/pseuds/GothicPixi
Summary: A young human-looking man enters the busy gymnasium. They hadn’t seen him before. No one else is paying attention to him, so he stands alone scanning the room. He’s on the pudgier side, in a simple combo of blue denim jeans, white tee shirt, and a blue denim jacket. He somehow rocks it.Writing Prompt: You have been accepted into a school for supernatural creatures. You decide to let your classmates and teachers try to figure out what you are.Mythic School AU





	Local Creatures Scream for Twenty Minutes and Nothing is Accomplished

**Author's Note:**

> I know it was forever ago, but thank you for the title suggestion bulletproof bear from the TAZFW discord.  
> I only proofread, like, half of this, so let me know if there are any major mistakes or confusions.  
> Try to guess what Barry is before the end!
> 
> Enjoy! :)

A young human-looking man enters the busy gymnasium. They hadn’t seen him before. No one else is paying attention to him, so he stands alone scanning the room. He’s on the pudgier side, in a simple combo of blue denim jeans, white tee shirt, and a blue denim jacket. He somehow rocks it. Taako turns to his sister, about to make a quip or joke when he sees the expression on her face: she’s staring at the new guy, smiling gently. He punches her arm and she’s startled out of her daze.

 

“What?” She grumbles, peeling her gaze from the blue jean monstrosity of a new student.

 

“Seriously? Him of all beings?!” Taako scrunches up his nose and frowns as Lup rolls her eyes and crosses her arms.

 

“He might not be everyone’s type, Koko, but to me he is,” she pauses to size the stranger up again, “a moderately tall glass of water.” Taako makes gagging noises and shoves her off the bench they were sharing.

 

“We don’t even know what he is! What if he’s a were like Magnus, that’d be nasty.” Lup hovers over where she would have fallen right on her ass, and sticks her tongue out at her twin before shrinking herself. She flies to beside his ear.

 

“I’m gonna go do some recon. Bet he’ll notice me?”

 

“Depends on what he is.” Taako grabs at his sister but she flitters out of his reach. “Some species have a high passive perception like us.” Lup’s tiny form shrugs. She is smaller than his hand and she glows faintly with magic. Her miniscule hands flips him off before she zooms away, up towards the ceiling. Taako watches her circle the new guy from above before diving down behind him. Takao definitely saw her tap his ass, because Bluejeans turns around and she quickly moves out of his periphery. She flew up to the top of his head and studies his hair, his ears. Finally, she simply went in front of him and grew back to “human size” (or just slightly smaller than average). The new guy stumbles backwards. Taako takes this as his cue to go and join his sister. He doesn’t even shrink himself before floating over to sit on his sister’s shoulders.

 

“H-hello.” The blue jeans man gave a nervous smile and Taako huffs while Lup smirks.

 

“I’m Taako, this is Lup.” Lup says, sticking a hand out for shaking. Taako snickers, making sure he holds on to her head for stability. Bluejeans considers this, before shaking her hand.

 

“It’s nice to meet you, Lup.” He looked at her. “And Taako.” He looked at him. The twins eyed him suspiciously. “I’m Barry.”

 

“Pleasure to meet you, Barry Bluejeans.” Lup taps her brother’s leg, signalling that he should get down. He huffs again and floats himself up and over a little before landing gracefully on his feet beside her. “It seems you solved our name puzzle.”

 

“Twins fairies. Lots of trickery opportunities in that alone.” Barry shrugs. His cheeks are a soft shade of pink that make Lup’s stomach do flips.

 

“Assumptions, my dude. Don’t make them here.” Taako warns, looking uninterested as he checks his brightly painted nails. “Lulu,” he turns to his sister, “you seen any of the goon squad this morning?” She shakes her head. “Drat.” As if on cue, a loud noise by the doors makes most of the people in the gym turn. There is a large brown bear with a slightly smaller brown bear beside it. Taako groans and walks menacingly over, tall heels making an ominous clicking noise in the now quieted gym. “Magnus Burnsides, Julia Waxman, what the hell?” He stands in front of the bears, hands on his hips. If giant bears could look sheepish, that is how anyone would describe them right now. The smaller one glows a little and is replaced by a tough but gentle looking woman with thick brown hair. The larger one shrinks and morphs into a scarred and beefy man with impressive sideburns. He goes to grip Taako in a hug but the fairy floats up away from him, arms and legs now crossing as he stares down at his friends.

 

“Taako, come on, I haven’t seen you in weeks!” Magnus complains, jumping up to try and grab his flying friend. Julia just laughs.

 

“Nuh-uh, you smell nasty, Mags. Like some sort of wild animal.” Magnus stops jumping and crosses his arms.

 

“That’s racist, Taako.” He says and then the two are giggling messes.

 

“What’s happening?” Barry whispers to Lup, who is enjoying this just as much as she does every time it happens. She waves a hand to dismiss his question.

 

“This is their thing, you get used to it. Magnus is a werebear, his girlfriend Julia is a shapeshifter.” Barry nods and the gym starts going back to normal, losing interest in the bear distraction. “Come on, I’ll introduce you.” She puts a hand on his back and guides him forward, through the thin crowd, and to her brother.

 

“New friend!” Magnus exclaims when he sees Barry. “Hi, I’m Magnus Burnsides. I’m a bear!” Taako and Lup snicker at this. Magnus pulls Barry into a friendly hug.

 

“I’m Barry.” He says once he’s released. “Nice to meet you.” Julia steps closer to Magnus, leaning gently against his side and giving Barry an easy smile.

 

“I’m Julia Waxman, sometimes a bear.” They shake hands. Taako coughs to get the other’s attention.

 

“Has anyone seen Tall, Dark, and Handsome this fine morning?” He had finally fallen back to the ground, where he stood on guard with his arms still crossed.

 

“Angus said Kravitz was helping him with something in the library, I think. Lucretia probably knows.” Julia shrugs, making the male fairy groan.

 

“I just want to see my blood-sukcing boyfriend.” He whines, stomping his foot on the ground like an upset child who isn’t allowed to go and play at the park. Lup cackles, moving to slap her brother playfully on the back.

 

“Not many places he can hide from you, bro bro. Don’t you have most of your classes together?”

 

“I can’t kiss him during class.” Taako grumbles, causing the others to laugh again. A small clearing of a throat has them all look over at the entrance they’re standing by. A boy in what would be the fanciest boy clothes stands there, smiling at them without showing teeth.

 

“Hello sirs and ma’ams!” He chirps. The boy seems to lift Taako’s mood slightly.

 

“Hey Ango!” Magnus moves to ruffle the boy’s hair but he slips away to hide behind Lup.

 

“I’d rather you not do that, sir. We’ve discussed this.” He notices Barry then. “Hello! I haven’t seen you around before, I’m Angus McDonald.” They shake hands. Barry’s hand is starting to get tired.

 

“I’m Barry.”

 

“Barry Hallwinter?”

 

“..yes?”

 

“You’re named after you grandfather? Sildar? You look like him.”

 

“Do you...how do you know my grandfather? He died a while back, before I was born. You’re, like, twelve.” The others giggled and Barry looked around at them. “What?”

 

“I was eleven and I’ve stayed in that form. However,” Angus opened his mouth to showcase a pair of sharp fangs, “I’m actually ninety three.”

 

“Fuck, I’m sorry. That was, that was presumptuous of me. I’ve never met a vampire turned so young. That's..quite fascinating.”

 

“Most haven’t.” Angus shrugs. “You get used to it after eighty years.”

 

“Eighty two.” A woman appears behind Angus, two journals in each of her hands. Angus rolls his eyes.

 

“Yes, eighty two. Thank you, ma’am.” The woman moves the notebooks to one hand and nods at Barry.

 

“I’m Lucretia. I work in the front office for free period, so if you need any information about the school, I would be the best resource and not one of these chucklefucks.” She turns to face Taako. “Kravitz told me to tell you he’s in Merle’s classroom.” The fairy doesn’t even say goodbye before he’s flying out of the gym.

 

“Kids these days.” Angus shakes his head.

 

\---

 

Barry fit well into their friend group, and he easily slid in within the next few weeks. They learned a lot about Barry: he doesn’t like most vegetables, he likes to swim alone in cold lakes on warm days, he only wears pants made of denim, he is incredibly observant, he is enrolled in three science classes, he says he is a very bad singer, and he doesn’t react too well to lactose. He was quite enjoying his first term at their supernatural university. What they don’t know, however, is what species he is. Barry won’t tell them. He seems human enough, and he is so good in his necromancy class that they think he might just be a witch like Lucretia. But Taako thinks something is different about this one.

 

“He fits in too well, Krav. We were all friendly to him, immediately. Even I can’t hate him, and that’s something.” Taako rants while perched in his boyfriend’s lap. They are currently snuggling in the fairy’s dorm room, his werebear roommate out with his girlfriend again.

 

“Dove, I think you’re overthinking this. Maybe he has some rustic hospitality, like Magnus.”

 

“No, it’s more than that. Rustic hospitality doesn’t work on me. His natural charisma is too high for a human of his appearance.”

 

“Everyone has a type, Taako. Don’t be mean.” Kravitz pokes his tricky boyfriend in the side and watches him squirm.

 

“That’s my personality, you signed up for this.” Taako sticks his tongue out. “Kravy, what creatures have a high natural charisma?”

 

“There are quite a few.” The vampire sighs. “You might want to bring it up with Angus. He’s quite a good detective.” Taako groans. “I know you like him, you don’t have to pretend with me.”

 

“I see him as a baby but also an elderly man, it’s confusing. Sometimes he acts like a kid but then he’ll spout out all this historical knowledge.” Taako digs his face into Kravitz’s chest, makeup probably smudging onto his black vest. “I don’t want to talk about Agnes, I want to theorize about Barry like a conspiracy duck.”

 

“Or we could do our astrology homework?” Kravitz suggests, trying in vain again to reach for his notebook on the bedside table. Taako corralls that arm in with one of his socked feet.

 

“Nah-ah, no sir-ee, not doing homework yet, my dude. I’ll drop the Barold thing for now, but I will be investigating at a further date.” He wriggles his butt deeper into Kravitz’s lap. “There is plenty of other ~fun~ stuff we can do to pass the time before dinner.” Taako wiggles his eyebrows in a very dramatically suggestive way and his boyfriend laughs.

 

“Fine, I’m sure we could study...anatomy.”

 

\---

 

A few days later, at lunch, Lup sneaks up behind Barry and grabs at his sensitive sides. The man squawks and stumbles forward, quickly turning to see who tickled him. Lup is bent over laughing.

 

“Barold, holy Istus, that was  _ hilarious _ .” She managed between breathes. “How did you even make that magnificent noise?!”

 

“It's, um, natural..I guess. I don't know. A shock reaction? I never thought about it.”

 

“Not a lot of people tickle attack you?”

 

“I didn't really have a lot of..friends back home. I'm a little odd.”

 

“You could say that again.” Taako mumbled from across the table. His sister tossed a pencil at him, which he caught.

 

“Shut up, Koko.” She sat down beside Barry. “Tell is more about home?” She promoted. The man shrugged.

 

“It's nothing special. I mean, it's definitely different from here, but I'm used to adapting. It's more windy at home? It's hard to, er, describe.”

 

“It sounds like you're avoiding giving us clues as to what you are.” Taako accused, leaning across his food to glare at the newbie. Kravitz rolled his eyes and continued reading.

 

“That's, um, quite the accusation.” Barry tugged at his collar. “Ever consider that people like to keep things private?”

 

“I'm a pixie, I don't respect privacy.” Taako stated this as if it was obvious. Barry glared at him, sighed, and straightened his back. He leaned forward slightly, canting his head to the side.

 

“Taako,” his voice was almost unnoticeably more melodic, “I would prefer if you dropped the subject.” The fairy blinked a few times before leaning back and picking up a chip.

 

“Yeah, sure, no problem my dude.” Lup and Kravitz eyed him curiously. Taako never dropped anything. 

 

“Are you feeling alright, darling?” The vampire rose a hand to feel his boyfriend’s forehead. It sent a shiver through the fairy.

 

“Chilly hands, Batsy.” He swatted them away. “I'm fine, I swear on Merle's arm.”

 

“You don't give a shit about Merle's arm.” Lup kicked her brother under the table.

 

“You got me there.”

 

\---

 

It had been nearly three months since Barry came to their university, and it already felt like they knew him forever. He fit into their friend group seamlessly. Lup, much to her brother’s chagrin, was flirting with the man like crazy. It almost seemed like Barry couldn’t take it, but everytime, he found some sort of smooth comeback in his own, very awkward and Barry kind of way. Birds of a feather flock together, especially when both of those birds are weird nerds with crushes on each other. They did homework together in the library. Barry joined the twins and Kravitz for coffee most mornings, even though he didn’t drink caffeine. They all sat together for meals, random times each day when every or most of them happened to be free.

 

It was a Friday night and everyone in their little group was done with classes and found that the best way to put off their school work was to get dinner. They found a long table in the dining hall and settled in once they filled their plates (or three plates, for Magnus). The vampires kept the lids of their opaque cups on and enjoyed a few treats while their friends ate fully.

 

“You can’t have that.” Angus reached across the table and stopped Barry from eating a forkful his salad.

 

“What?” Barry looked between the vampire and the food on his fork. “Oh, there’s mushroom in this.” He put the fork down.

 

“Are you allergic to mushrooms?” Lucretia asked. Angus gave Barry a look, but the man just shrugged.

 

“Uh, kinda? It’s something that runs in my family.” Angus rolled his eyes at this.

 

“I hope you haven’t been eating an excessive amount of onion either.” Angus murmured, taking a sip from his cup. “Or salt, or avocado, or chocolate, or alcohol.”

 

“I can have all of those things in moderation, please shut up. I’m not completely-” Barry stopped himself from continuing, voice low as he leaned forward to reply to Angus.

 

“What do you-Taako, are you writing this down?!” Kravitz started, but his gaze landed on his boyfriend, who was scribbling stuff down on his arm.

 

“Don’t fucking worry about it, handsome. I’m just making this list so I can transfer it somewhere else so then when I eventually cook for all you fools and Bear is there, I don’t poison him or whatever.” Taako made serious I contact with his partner. “I wouldn’t want that to happen again.” He refocused on Barry. “Any other allergens or what have you?” Barry considered this.

 

“I don’t...believe so? Peanuts, probably. Raw dairy, but I’m lactose intolerant so that was obvious. Ummmm. Angus, am I missing anything?”

 

“He can have small concentrations of garlic or onion, small amounts of cooked mushroom of certain species, no high-sodium, not a lot of avocado, minimal caffeine, small servings of chocolate, and minimal alcohol.” Angus recited, sitting up straight as if he was digging into a back catalog of information in his brain.

 

“How the hell do you know all this about Barry?” Magnus spoke up finally, carefully stacking his three empty plates. Angus and Barry shared a look, the latter slightly shaking his head.

 

“I’ve studied his race before. I worked with his Grandfather.” Was his simple answer.

 

“So you’ve known what he is this whole time?!” Takao slammed his hands on the table.

 

“Koko, calm down. It isn’t that important.”

 

“So you aren’t curious, Lulu?”

 

“Please stop shaking the table, you’ll spill my wine.” Lucretia piped up.

 

“Can’t we just have one quiet meal.” Davenport, at the end of the table with Merle, sighed. “This is why I prefer to eat with the other staff.”

 

“We can’t leave our kids all alone, Dav.” The satyr kicked the leprechaun under the table. Davenport rolled his eyes.

 

“They are not our children and they are all functioning adults.”

 

“Functioning is pretty generous.” Lucretia called over to them. Julia stopped her conversation with Magnus to nod and smile at the older men.

 

“Most of this table is disaster gays and bis.” She reminded them, a particular look leveled at Merle.

 

“I’m a distinguished gay and I would say we have two other distinguished people at this table.” Davenport crossed his arms. “The bi,” he pointed at Julia, “and the lesbian.” He pointed at Lucretia, who was chugging his glass of wine now as Taako and Lup argued.

 

“Krav is pretty distinguished.” Merle argued.

 

“He’s a disaster around Taako, though, so I’d say that demotes him to Functional most of the time.”

 

“What about Angus?” Magnus was now taking food from Lucretia’s plate. She didn’t bother stopping him. It seemed maybe she got extra just for him to steal.

 

“Angus McDonald is far more superior than simply Distinguished.”

 

\---

 

Taako had had enough. Angus wouldn’t tell him anything, Barry wouldn’t tell him anything, and none of his other friends would help him. They’d just given up on finding out what Barry is! Taako wanted to know! Sure, everyone had a right to privacy and maybe Barry was embarrassed or something, but he could also be hiding something. Taako really just didn’t like understanding things. He didn’t want to insult or hurt Barry. When Angus started talking about the things Barry couldn’t eat, Taako almost had an anxiety attack. He hadn’t cooked for his new friend yet, but he could have hurt him. He didn’t want to hurt Barry. If he just knew what Barry was, it wouldn’t be a problem! He wouldn’t have to worry, or ask questions, or put down his facade for two seconds and seem like a person that cares. 

 

Fairies weren’t supposed to care. They were supposed to be tricky and rude and mean. Taako had fallen for that when he was younger, but he was getting better. He was a wonderful actor - not a liar, not a liar, he was just acting. Lup had never listened to the lessons their court gave them. They ran away as children, and they were still very young for fae. But outside of the court, they aged faster and their powers were different. Taako was good as changing things, a simple act of trickery. Lup liked to set things on fire, a slightly more obvious attack but still fun. When they didn’t have food, Taako would change rocks into snacks, dirty water into milk, logs into meat. Lup made shelters, located fairy houses in gardens, built their campfires. It had been decades on the run before they found the university and they found their friends. They’d been there for decades now, trying to negate the pain of the past. It was hard to do that.

 

Once, Taako asked Lucretia if she could make a memory-altering potion. The witch was adept in multiple fields, but at the time she thrived in potions. She used a strange sea creature to create a nasty drink and suddenly half of Taako’s life was static. He didn’t recognize his sister when she came into the room and Lucretia immediately started working on the cure. It took a few days. Taako was lost, a shell of himself. He recognized his friends, but not his sister. He couldn’t even use his magic. When he finally got the next potion and his memory was restored, he locked himself in his room for a week. Lup and Angus were the only ones allowed inside. It took him a few more weeks to talk to Lucretia again, even though it was an accident. Kravitz came along a few years later. But before that, there was Sazed.

 

Sazed was a hybrid. His grandfather was a gargoyle, and his grandmother and father were human. Being one fourth gargoyle meant he could see and attend the university, but people didn’t really like him too much. He wasn’t the prettiest fella either, but he gave Taako attention. Most people gave Taako attention. Sazed didn’t like sharing, and he didn’t like being ignored. Taako used to cook for everyone at the school, because it was fun and he got praised. He could cook for a small army. Sazed sent that small army to the infirmary. Taako thought he’d transmuted something wrong. People started accusing the fairy of a long con. Angus discovered the potions in Sazed’s room and he was brought to justice. However, it took Taako a while to heal. No one died, but everyone was wary of him now. His whole friend group became a little distrusted. The court would have been proud of him. He didn’t want to make the court proud. He didn’t want Barry to be another Sazed. Lup’s magic wasn’t subtle - if one was trying to frame her, the school would be ashes and people would be seriously injured. They were lucky Sazed couldn’t afford the deadlier potions.

 

All this taken into account, Taako broke into Barry’s dorm room on a night the man was out with Magnus and Lucretia. He knew Barry didn’t have a roommate. He also had a copy of the universal key to get into the rooms. Being friendly with the desk staff and flirting enough to get your hands behind the desk really paid off. Brad hadn’t even noticed. The room was about what Taako had expected from the nerd - papers everywhere, various jars with weird liquids, a closet full of blue denim and solid color tees. The bed was messy, but not with blankets. It was like it was being used for quick storage and counter space, not sleep. There was a blanket over the desk chair, though. “Falls asleep at his desk like a nerd. Sweet Istus, Bear, that cannot be comfy.” He started rifling through the papers. “Maybe that’s why he sits so weird and hunched over.” Nothing interesting, mostly math and science work. He started opening drawers. Notebooks, school supplies, pictures, more supplies, more notebooks, a sketchpad..wait, pictures?! Taako fumbled with them as he pulled them from the third drawer he searched. 

 

A younger Barry, equivalent to the human age of 8 maybe, standing on a rocky cliff by the ocean, in denim shorts and a tank top. His hand is shading his face as he looks around in front of him. The second picture is the next in the sequence, except a bird has landed beside the boy and he is looking at it, mouth open as if speaking to it. The next is Barry, older, human late teens, denim capris and a graphic tee. The same cliff but taken from the other side so you can’t see the water. Now the boy has a straw hat on and is glaring at the camera, arms crossed. There is a wing in the corner of the page, like a bird was flying away when the picture was taken. The last photo is a toddler, presumably Barry Bluejeans (Hallwinter, whatever). He is wearing a yellow blanket like a cape. He is running at the camera, arms blurry as they move the blanket behind him like wings. At least that’s what Taako guesses. Seems like something kids would do, he hasn’t been around real kids in a long time. The baby Barry is smiling at the person taking the picture and, for some reason, that warms Taako’s heart. He puts the pictures back.

 

\---

 

Julia swears she just saw Barry talking to a bird. Like, having a conversation in chirps and shit...with a bird. She shakes her head, blinking a few times for good measure. She shifts her ears so she can hear better - he is now all the way across the quad, by the cherry blossom tree where the dryads like to make out. He is sitting on the edge of the fountain,  _ talking to a bird _ . She isn’t sure what type of bird, that’s not really her thing, but it’s definitely interesting. She hears a few more chirps and whistles be exchanged before the bird flies away from the empty quad. Julia texts Taako.

 

\---

 

“Barry! Get your feminine hips over here!” Lup called Barry over to their squad’s table in the courtyard. Barry rolled his eyes and continued at the same pace.

 

“What’s up? You all look excited.” Everyone at the table seemed a little giddy. The university was a safe haven, but it was also still a school. It helped keep these growing creatures up to date on the stuff that changed outside their magical world. They had just finished exams.

 

“We’re going on a beach trip!” Magnus cheered. Barry froze.

 

“Merle has a nice place up the coast a bit, and Dav’s gonna take us out on his boat. You in?” Taako beamed. He usually wasn’t this excited about most things, but his exams had been rough this time around.

 

“I’m, um..kinda afraid of the ocean, actually?” Barry tried. It didn’t convince the twins.

 

“Bear, come oooooooonnnnnn.” Lup clung to his arm, pouting. “We’ll be relaxing, chilling in the sun, swimming in that cold cold water.”

 

“You’ll see Lup in a swimsuit.” Taako added.

 

“It’s a good view.” Lucretia didn’t even look up from her book. Lup swat at her brother and flipped off the witch.

 

“Really, guys? What am I to you?”

 

“A….moderately tall glass of water.” Taako leaned forward and whispered to his sister, who blushed.

 

“Shut the fuck up.”

 

“You don’t have to get in the water if we go, Barry.” Kravitz pat his boyfriend on the back. “I’m not the biggest fan of the sun and I’m still going.”

 

“He’s gonna go full goth, big parasol, covered shoulders.” Taako whispered conspiratorially. 

 

“You don’t want to miss it,” Kravitz said, deadpan. Barry sighed.

 

“Fine,” he conceded, “as long as you tell me where  _ exactly _ we’re going.” The twins raised a brow at this, but shrugged.

 

“Sweet, my dude, no problem. We’re headed to Bottlenose Cove, specifically the township with the Margaritaville. Mythic friendly, completely cleared up for ol’ Earl Merle and his boo.”

 

“Please, for the love of all things, do not call Davenport Merle’s ‘boo’.” Angus, who had been reading quietly like Lucretia, looked up. “The captain does not appreciate that in the slightest.”

 

“Well boo hoo.”

 

\---

 

This was all going terribly wrong. Barry should never have come. If he wanted to keep his race a secret, he should have stayed far, far away from the ocean cliffs. But here he was, in a familiar territory. He wouldn’t call it home - he’d been traveling for awhile - but his family lived near there. Fuck.  _ Fuck _ . That looks Taako was giving him when they pulled up to the beach and Barry froze, he  _ knew _ . Barry needed to leave.

 

“No leaving, bubeleh. We just got here! We’re going on a little boat trip first so it’s no big thang.” Taako practically dragged Barry on to the Starblaster. (“Why is your boat the Starblaster? Should it be the Seablaster or something?” “Whoever threw that paper, your moms a hoe.”) It had some space below deck, but Dav wouldn’t let them down there yet. Merle took their bags down, but they had to sit on the benches around the deck. Soon enough, they took off around the cove at a calm pace. Barry anxiously kept his eyes toward the sky. He didn’t need this, not right now. Not this soon. A loud call had them all look toward the cliff.

 

**BARRY SILDAR HALLWINTER** . It was less like a bird song and more like a bird yell.  _ Fuck _ .

 

“What language is that shouting?” Magnus covered his ears. Taako and Angus stared Barry down, one grinning and the other expecting.

 

“Bird.” Julia recognized it.

 

“Siren.” Angus corrected, still levelling Barry. The man sighed, stood, and faced the cliff.

 

“Cap’n, cut the engine.” Taako leisurely waved at the leprechaun, who complied.

 

**Mother, you’re scaring my friends.**

 

**THEY CLEARLY DON’T UNDERSTAND US, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?**

 

**I’m pretty sure Angus know’s Siren, and they didn’t know I was a siren.**

 

**ARE YOU STILL ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, SON? IF THEY ARE MAKING FUN OF YOU, I WILL DROWN THEM.**

 

**Please do not drown my friends, mother. And I just...I didn’t want them treating me differently.**

 

**FINE. MAY I MEET THEM?** Barry surveyed his friends. Most of them seemed confused. Taako seemed overjoyed.

 

**Fine, but preferably less bird.**

 

**I AM NOT ASHAMED, I WILL DO AS I PLEASE.** A figure flew from the cliff and onto the front of the ship. She had the head and body of a woman, but wings like a bird instead of arms. A simple cloth covered her. “Idiot son.”

 

“Mother.” Barry crossed his arms. “Have you been well?”

 

“Of course. Plenty of mortal sailors try to come into the cove. I have kept them out and kept us safe.” Barry nodded.

 

“Nice to see you again, Mrs. Hallwinter.” Angus chirped, standing and waving. Barry’s mother brightened and dove forward, hugging the vampire close.

 

**ANGUS MY SWEET CHILD, HOW ARE YOU?**

 

**“I’m fine, ma’am.”** He responded in rough siren, but it was understandable.

 

“Wait, so...Barry is a..male siren?” Kravitz raised his hand. Taako nodded excitedly.

 

“There’s gotta be a siren for every type.” Lucretia shrugged. Lup smirked.

 

“Hell yeah there is.” Barry looked over at her and she winked.

 

“Is this why you don’t take choral classes?” Magnus asked. It seemed the easiest thing for him to comprehend. Barry’s mother chuckled.

 

“Oh, he can’t sing for shit. He sounds like a dying bird.”


End file.
